Dec. 21st, 2024

sparklight: (road)
Some talk (navelgazing, really) about my smut writing below (in general, but also specifically about my brief forays into PIV sex), so if you're not interested in that, don't read further.


navelgazing within.
I mostly write smut because of the character interactions and feelings it can/will bring up for the characters, about themselves, their partner (regardless the consent level involved in the fic), whatever the relationship is between the two characters, and such. That's always been the main draw, from playing with spark sex when writing TF and perfectly regular human sex now that I have human characters in ships lol.

I'm... very obviously mostly an m/m shipper, and then an f/f one (most of what I read when I read fiction is f/f, even if I don't engage with any of those stories or characters fannishly).

Helen/Paris is the first m/f ship I've had that I'm not just writing fic for (as I've done for a couple others, here and there), but smut fic for.

And it doesn't matter that I do headcanon that they have PIV sex and both enjoy that. It doesn't matter that when I've written it, I put Helen in charge, either literally or metaphorically on top. It sparks no joy, it scratches no itches, even when I can make the way they have PIV sex still say something about the dynamics of their relationship (the "Helen is in charge" and d/s angles/flavouring or outright that).

And sure, I guess that's not really a problem or anything. It doesn't squick me to write (reading other people's work, however, m/f PIV sex is... touching up on being a squick for me), but it's not interesting. I also already knew I'm not at all interested in cock/cock-like object going into a woman's orifices, regardless of the ship-type.

When I read or write f/f, it's both deeply uninteresting and becomes almost squicky when at least one, or maybe both, women's arousal and lust is centered around "I want to be filled". Deeply a problem for me when it comes to professionally published f/f with sex scenes. It is very often a feature and it turns me off so much. Doesn't matter if it's a strap-on or just fingers; that's still too much penetration for me for what I want from an f/f sex scene.

And the same apparently basically applies for m/f sex for me. I really do not want the female character to be penetrated. In any of her orifices (there's definitely a reason I've never written oral sex where Helen is giving it).

Again, I guess, not a problem, really. I can just write whatever smut I want, and if that is pegging (or alpha!Helen with a cock when it comes to omegaverse), because I want Paris fucked, and cunnilingus, no harm, no foul, right?

It's just... idk. It feels kind of odd, too. I guess partially because "obviously" a m/f couple "ought" to be having PIV sex. And I do think Helen and Paris are having it. And pegging in the Bronze Age feels kind of like pushing realism, even if - who cares right, it's just fun smut, whatever. I'm still sitting here feeling awkward about it, for some dumb reason.

December 2024

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